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Did You Know...
Did You Know...
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NAF Facts


Did You Know... First Appeared In

That the tallest player ever to stride onto a Blood Bowl field was the legendary Gurk Cloud-Scraper, storm giant half-back for the Asgard Ravens? Standing as tall as nine men, Gurk played in only one match before being barred for life for excessive violence.

The shortest player ever was the equally legendary Big Jobo Hairyfeet, opposing captain of the halfling Greenfield Grasshuggers team in the same game, whose sudden and quite drastic reduction in height was the main reason for Gurk's ban!

That the longest game ever played was finally abandoned after 19 days when the remaining member of each team killed the other in a mad scramble for the ball? The game - the human Kishargo Werebears versus the Darkside Cowboys dark elf team. The final score - 2-2, match abandoned owing to death of teams. 1st
That there was once a team of gnomes, the Shortstuff Scurriers, who first started playing in the Blood Bowl in 2479? The unfortunate team lost 34 games in a row - their first ever 34 games, in fact - and promptly disbanded and went home again, taking their ball with them. 1st
According to the rules of the original game, a match stated with the ball being tossed up between the teams by a hapless referee. The upshot of this was usually a dead referee, of course, so the practice was stopped and a kick-off used instead. Now, at least, the referee can stay out of the way and not get flattened! 1st
That the longest scoring attempt ever made was 41 leagues, in a game between te Dwarf Warhammerers and the orcish Gouged Eyes team, by one Stunted Grom Red-Axe? Loaded into a distinctly illegal cannon in the dwarf End Zone, Grom was fired towards the other end of the pitch, with every intention of scoring a Touchdown. Hoewver, there was far too much gunpowder in the muzzle and the hapless dwarf was blown half-way across the kingdom. Luckily Red-Axe managed to cross the Touchdown line - albeit seventy yards above the ground - so the scoring attempt counted! Unluckily the teams had to wait four days for the return of their only ball before the game could restart! 1st
That in the year 2461 a player for the halfling team, the Bluebay Crammers scored a Touchdown without his feet ever leaving his own Starting Zone? Lefty (later known as Stumpy) Boggit was hit by an Ogre from the opposing Chaos All-Stars team, and flew all the way to the other end of the field - leaving a pair of small, hairy feet behing him! 1st
That no halfling team has ever won a championship in the entire history of the game? So why do they do it, you ask? For the post-match feast, of course! 1st
The limit of 16 players per team was only introduced in 2482. Previously, a team could swap players as often as it wished. The rule was finally introduced after the deaths of 743 Halflings from the Greenfield Grasshuggers at the hands of the Asgard Ravens Norse berserker team 1st
According to their unholy religion, the Chaos All-Stars must cook and eat their coach if they lose a game. If they win, of course, they’re allowed to eat him raw. 1st
The Halfling team, the Stunted Stoutfellows, were once blessed with good fortune when their opponents, the Chaos All-Stars, failed to arrive for their match until half-time – by which time the plucky little guys were only 2-1 down! 1dz
Skurfrik Stone-Sucker, running back for the imaginatively named Hobgoblin Team, often turns up for a match several days before match day. Well, it takes him that long to tie up his boot laces. 1dz
That there has never, ever been an interesting fact about a Troglodyte player. Mind you, that's quite an interesting fact, trivia fans, so perhaps we were wrong. 1dz
That the shortest ever game on record was won by a team of students from the High Archmage's College of Temporal Magic, though they were later disqualified. After all, what was the point of their opponents turning up for the match, if all the wizards were going to do was hope back in time three days and win the game before the fixture was even decided? 1dz
The Craggen Counts, a team from the vampire-infested Border Principalites, were banned from the league in 2485. Why? Well, when everyone else was sucking an orange at half-time the Counts were usually helping themselves to the crowd! 1dz
That bribery is now so common amongst referees that rules have been introduced conerning where, when and how one can accept a bribe. The situation has become so bad that the NAF governing body is considering appointing a second bunch of referees to govern the conduct of the first lot! 1dz

That merchandising and advertising has become a very large part of a Blood Bowl players job in recent years. Varag Ghoul-Chewer of the Orcish Gouged Eye team for example, plugs a mouthwash for gettnig rid of these really stubborn blood stains and bad breath problems. Meanwhile Morg'th N'Hthrog, the gigantic Ogre battering ram makes a good living advertising a firm that makes brick, er, santiation facilities. Advertisers do find problems come when the star of your new multi-million gold piece ad campaign gets pulled to pieces by a pack of werewolves just days before the first ads are run...

That someone once marketed a range of Nurgles Rotters merchandise. Most did alright considering that no one would ever admit to being a supporter, but not a single one of the replica team shirts were ever sold. Mind you, do you know anyone who would fit a pus and puce coloured, eleven armed, three neck-holed shirt, eight metres across? 1dz
Nurgles Rotters have given away fewer touchdowns than any other team in the NAF league? It isn't that they have a great defensive strategy; it's more that their opponents almost never turn up for the game... Who says Blood Bowl players are stupid? 1dz
Contrary to popular belief and despite frequent and very persistent rumours, the revolutionary new Astrogranite playing surface is definitely not made from the bones of defeated Blood Bowl Trophy finalists. Honest. Well, that’s what they told us. 2rb
The impressive collective fan movement known as the Wave has now been replaced by the Chuck, in which the largest fans in sequence toss the smallest fans as high into the air as possible! Catching them again is apparently optional. 2rb
Possibly the most heroic effort ever was put in by Evil Gits lineman Karg Stabneck, who managed to crawl 94 paces to score, despite having both legs torn off by a rampaging Oldheim Ogres player at his own 6-pace line. 2rb
That the late Engel "The Exterminator" Von Evilstein was probably the most violent player ever. This frontline blitzer was often sent off for illegal use of automatic weaponry. Just before he was killed during an explosive attempt to wipe out the entire Underworld Creepers team at one go, he was reckoned to have accounted for an unbelieveable 824 players! 2rb
The Scarcrag Snivellers once kidnapped the coach of rival team, the Lowdown Rats, to discover their play secrets. The Coach held out for months and eventually the Goblins sent him home only to discover that he had stolen all the details of the Snivellers’ own special plays! 2rb
One of the most notorious Freebooters the NAF has ever know, Erik “the Dog” Jorgson – who regularly played in lycanthropic form – went through an uncontrolled metamorphosis while waiting in the dug-out. After he ate the rest of the subs, Blood Bowl organizers decided to install cages in all stadium dug-outs. Were-players have complained that this is a form of discrimination, but there are no plans to change the ruling as yet. 2rb
The sorcerous owner of the now-disbanded Mirkheim Mages was the unfortunate victim of a cross-time misunderstanding. He attempted to summon a new coach for his team through a timewarp into the future, but was unluckily crushed when a single-decker bus fell on him. 2rb
Half-orc Uthar Hagg of the Middenheim Marauders once punched out four referees during a pre-match coin-toss – and was promptly made Player of the Year by appreciative Marauders fans. 2rb
Stengard Wolfbeck of the Bluchen Berserkers was so rough and wild a player he was regularly sent off during team practice sessions! 2rb
Season tickets for Blood Bowl games can cost anything from 220 gold crowns for a Reikland Reavers cards, to a huge basket of iced buns for the Halfling Greenfield Grasshuggers team, to three chickens and a bag of rats for a lifetime of free Scarcrag Snivellers games! 2rb
That the Broadcasting networks have perfected a signal-protection device that stops coverage of Blood Bowl games being pirated by the glass balls of village witch doctors and wisewomen! Unfortunately they are now being sued by the Clairvoyants' guilds for causing interference with lines to the astral plane 2rb
The High Elf team the Dragon Princes, was made up exclusively of Elf Princes and High Lords, and were so haughty and proud that they refused to play anyone who was not of equal rank. Consequently they never got to play anyone at all, and were disbanded after five seasons without playing a single match!  
Blood Bowl has a growing and very enthusiastic following in Norsca, which is hardly surprising considering the Norse love of anything in the slightest bit violent. Norse teams are not renowned for their subtle tactics, and have been known to forget all about the ball in their rush to inflict severe and, if possible, crippling damage on the opposition!  
That the heaviest Snotling to play professional Blood Bowl was two-foot tall Sputum Boilbrain, who weighed in at an astonishing 115 lbs. He was also one of the worst ever Blood Bowl players as he was too heavy to be thrown far, too slow to be any use on his feet and too fat to live. He expired the first time he ran to catch the ball while training with the Lowdown Rats, and is remembered for drawing the first coherent words from the team’s coach, who later said to him, “Stoopid, useless git.”  
The highest score in a Championship game in 2493 was the Marauders 7-0 defeat of the Bugman's Best Dwarf team in the Blood Bowl play-offs. Many blame the defeat on the fact that the Dwarf players had been sampling the brew after which their team is named (the renowned Dwarf beer known as Bugman's XXXXXX) before the match started. Consequently most of the Dwarf players could barely stand up, let alone play Blood Bow!!  
''Spike!'' Magazine's number one All-time Worst Player Award goes to 'Speccy' McGroan of the Evil Gits - one of those truly incompetent cretins that Blood Bowl need if it is to retain its prime-time status! He played for only one season (2488-89) but over the year he managed to fumble the ball over 30 times, averaging more than two fumbles per match. Speccy's finest hour, however, was in his final match when he managed to fumble the ball a record nine times before he was pulled off (and then pulled apart!) by the Gits head coach.  
That Storm Giant Galak Starscraper was a key part in the experimental 'eye in the sky' telepathic vision system when he carried a sorcerer on his shoulder who transmitted what he saw to crystal balls and magic mirrors all over the Old World. The experiment ended in disaster when the sorcerer fell of Galak's shoulder during a particularly exciting match and was impaled on the helmet spikes of a passing player.  
Vermink Stink of the Skavenblight Scramblers was voted ''Most Unpopular Opponent of 2493'' by a panel of Blood Bowl players. This has less to do with Vermink's skill as a player than with a particularly unpleasant mutation, which has left him with such severe personal hygiene problems that most opposing players can't stand to get within 10 feet of him!  
Until on-pitch magic-users were banned by the Colleges of Magic, Hubris Rakarth was infamous for using his self-taught arcane magical powers during a match. In one game he managed to turn the entire front line of the Lowdown Rats into giant frogs. Sadly this plan backfired when it turned out that the frogs were better at Blood Bowl than the players they had replaced. In another game Hubris cast what he though was a temporary growth spell upon himself, that made him grow to almost eight foot tall. Hubris had one of his best games ever, but at the end of the match found that the counter-spell he had learnt didn’t work. Hubris remains eight foot tall to this day, and now no longer uses magical spells on the pitch.
That Chaos Dwarf Pukka Urgulg was rewarded with the mutations of obesity, leprous flesh and a particularly pungent noisome stench. Not only was he promptly voted 'Most Yukky Player' of the year the readers of Spike! magazine, but he was also fired from his team because none of the other players would go in the Dug-Out with him! WD105
That the most famous Skaven player of all was Tarsh Surehands. Tarsh had two heads and four arms, features which made him the leading pass receiver in the league. Sadly, in a crucial wild card game agains the SSSchHtt V'ggUYth snakeman team, a missed pass led to his two heads having a violent argument and before anyone could stop him he had strangled himself to death! WD86
That Spiky Norman is the 27th regular partner Borg’th N’hthrog’s has used for his famous ‘Goblin Cannonball’ tactic. What happened to the other 26? Well, 13 died in the line of duty, 7 retired hurt, 3 ran away, 2 are presently residing in the Middenheim City Hospital for Crazed Goblins, and 1 was high-kicked to death by the opposing team’s cheer-leaders… WD101
The best remembered Troll player of all time was Rumble-Gut Rockbelly of the now disbanded Badland Baddies. During a game against the Southside Squids in 2468, Rumble-Gut set the record for the most Team-Mates eaten in one match by consuming the entire squad, the coach, all of the cheerleaders, the team mascot, 120 fans and most of the south stand of the Squids’ arena WD104
Zip the Snotling wanted to play Blood Bowl so much that he consented to be sewn inside a football by the Chaos All-Stars for a vital play-off match against the Vynheim Valkyries. At an opportune moment Zip was hurled down the field. He pushed his legs free and scampered into the End Zone. Sadly the Touchdown was disallowed, it being ruled that a player must be holding the football, rather than being held in it, to score a touchdown WD104
The Cheerleaders of the Oldheim Ogres have been banned from appearing at any future matches after the shockwaves caused by their leaping up and down resulted in the collapse of the Hobgoblin Team’s recently rebuilt arena. WD104
Spike Pit Traps came into use after members of the Lowdown Rats complained to their coach that falling into a Pit Trap just didn’t hurt enough. “Landed on me ‘ead. Didn’t feel a fing,” they would say. The coach, who has now faded into deserved obscurity, came up with the idea of placing spikes at the bottom of the pits just to silence the complaining players. The Rats went through a lot of substitutes that season… WD106
Handy Slit-Sides, ace catcher for the Low Down Rats, became so fed-up with hardly ever being thrown a pass that he managed to arrange a transfer to the Darkside Cowboys, a Dark Elf team. His luck didn't change, however. Due to an administrative error, the Cowboys mistook Handy for their new team mascot and ritually sacrificed him before his first game! WD105
The mutations bestowed on the members of chaotic Blood Bowl teams are a reward from the foul deities they worship. Unfortunately, a Chaos god's idea of a great reward can sometimes leave a little to be desired, as mad Count Viktor von Dead of the Chaos All-Stars discoverd to his cost. After scoring the winning touchdown in a vital match agains the Hobgoblin Team, the Count was suddenly transformed into a mile-long tapeworm, and then crushed to death as the Hobgoblin Team's stadium (along with 30,000 fans) collapsed on his writhing body.  

Azgar Razorspine is the only player to have been sent off for using a magic item in a Blood Bowl final? The Evil Gits lineman brought on a magic rope which couldn't be crossed, and laid it along the edge of the Gits End Zone to prevent their opponents from scoring.

Sadly, as Azgar moved away the rope got caught up in his bootlaces and he swept his whole team off the pitch before he realised what was going on. Not surprisingly, the Ref realised the rope was a magic item and sent him off; in all, Azgar dragged 9,342 fans, 8 linemenm 3 wizards and a cheerleader down the tunnel to the changing room with him.

The High Seas Surfriders of the Elven Kingdoms League take so long to get made up for a game that they only manage to attend every other one. Stars
A look at the win bonuses of the Elfheim Eagles vs Nurgle's Rotters Blood Bowl XX game shows the different motivations of Blood Bowl super-stars. The Nurgle boys were on 1,000 Crowns a mutation, plus exposure to the disease of their choice, while each Eagle was given a five-year dry-cleaning contract, an exclusive designer hair-style, and a monogrammed mirror. Stars
The Dwarf Warhammerers secret weapon agains the Cowboys last year was - a searchlight! They stored so much magical energy in their orange squash tub it leaked out and lit up the stadium like day! The unexpected light destroyed the Cowboys throwing game, and even Moravis Curfew couldn't connect with star Catcher Asperon Thorn. The Warhammerers made an incredible 15 interceptions and ran away with the game, inflicting a crushing 3-0 defeat on the Cowboys Stars
The Skaven Scramblers are the only team ever to have retained the Blood Bowl trophy (well, if you discount the Severed Heads who just refused to give it back). In 2477 they beat the Marauders 3-1 in a game that lasted nine hours! Whew! A year later, they were champions again, beating the Gouged Eye 3-2. An NAF commission ruled out the possibility that the Scramblers had spent all year at the stadium, rigging it for the game, while a team of substitutes set about qualifying, but the pitch did show some pecularities on the day - mainly a pronounced slope towards the Eye's End Zone and an abnormal number of bottomless shafts... Stars
The Chaos All-Stars caused one rule change which was to their advantage. They had the rule about bringing weapons onto the pitch reworded so that they weren't called 'arms'. Eight limbed 'Spider' Smith was then allowed to play. Stars
In 2470, following years of disenchantment, several of the teams competing the Dwarf 'Stuntie' Cup competition threatened to leave the leagues they were competing in and form a league of their own. The increase in the throwing game was threatening to end whatever chance of success they had ever had!
The resulting World's Edge Superleague is a Dwarfs-only League, now trimmed to 12 second-rate teams playing a 22-match season. Curiously, the throwing game dominates! Those World's Edge fans just love to see the ball hanging up there while 22 players scramble for the honor of being the one it lands on!
Despite the interest of NAF teams, Morg'th N'hthrog's kid brother, Grunn'k M'mthrog, might not be destined for the astrogranite at all, as many other lucrative areas of employment are open to him. It is rumoured that the Necromancer's Broadcasting Circle Cabalvision Guild want to sign him up as a commentator in a bid to win the franchise back from their rivals. In addition to having a complete knowledge of how to truly splatter an opponent, Grunn'k's massive bulk is said to block the other mage's transmissions! Stars
In Albion, Treemen hold a special place in the defence-orientated local leagues. In fact, it is not unusual for teams to have names which show just how close to their Treemen roots they are. There's Knotinthem Forest, Shuffling Woodsday and Ashton Villains. Certain Chaotic teams are so opposed to that style of play, that their names carry anti-Treeman sentiments, shuch as Burn Lea and Rotsdale. Stars
The Reikland Reavers are reported to have the most aggressive marketing department in the NAF. They regularly mail 1,000,000 copies fo their newsletter, which - amongst other things - offers its readers prizes, such as a night out with Zug or a collection of Griff Oberwald's stitches. The hardest thing the world is to stop them sending you stuff! The Reavers Digest is one heck of a fan newsletter, sure enough. Stars
The official record for the Most Players Dismembered by a Referee is held by ex-Reaver's blitzer, Max 'Kneecap' Mittleman? Kneecap refused to follow the NAF Referees' Guidelines ("Never read 'em 'ave I?") and dispensed summary justice on the pitch with a pair of pliers, a branding iron and a chainsaw. (The latter was only used for Arguing the Ref calls). Kneecap was sacked after three games, but the NAF was forced to reinstate him due to 'pressure from the fans'. Kneecap claims "I never frettened 'em, wit' me chainser, honest!" Comp
To put a bit more pep into the Chaos Cup, from this season on, the losing team captain in each game must present himself to be eaten - by the Trophy. Blecccch! Comp
Not all ex-Blood Bowlers are fortunate enough to be able to continue their career on the pitch as a Referee. Many players have been permanently incapacitated by injuries from their playing days and just can't get by on their meager pension. If you see one of these poor unfortunates on the street, please give generously. Comp
Evil Knut of the Asgard Ravens is still the holder of one of the more unlikely NAF records. From 469-2474, over a period of 40 games, he set of 113 traps without sustaining so much as a scratch. In fact, the Ravens got so used to Knut's good fortune that their opening play in every game was to have him wander around the pitch setting off spear traps, opening pits and making the arena safe for his teammates.
Knut finally met his end when the Warhammerers went for broke and mined half of the pitch with explosives. It wrecked their entire arena, killed 7 of their players and brought down the wrath of the NAF, but the Warhammerers were still happy with their choice. "There is no Knut too tough for us to crack," boasted a spokesmen for their owners.
Skeleton Freeboter Ricardo Ferminelli, once of the Pergamo Pastas, made it his ambition to play for every NAF league team once he turned Undead following a five-player gang-up block. Oddly enough, he claime to prefer working with live teammates. He made it through the AFC in 5 seasons, then started on the NFC. Just 3 teams short of his goal, he was tragically buried by a Westside Werewolf. The world is still waiting for him to reappear. Comp
Hubris Rakarth and Griff Oberwald are among the highest paid players in the NAF. Apart from basic salaries of about 1,000 Gold Crowns a game, each also draws a substantial income from public appearances, endorsements and other special payments. However, the best contract anyone has ever wrangeld out of an NAF team is Morg'th N'hthrog's. It states that he should be paid whatever he wants. Comp
Even the loyalty of a Halfling can be dented. The Marienburg Fishers, an NAF team between 2460-2470, lost 150 games out of 159 played, payed its players just 11 times in those 10 years, saw 94 players killed and 1,398 injured, bus still kept coming back for more. That is, until just after the first Touchdown in a game against the All-Stars, when the players found there were no oranges in the Dug-Out. They quit on the spot. Comp
Half-Orc Blitzer Joachim Goadmalice believed in training very, very hard. While with the Oldheim Ogers, he caused them more casualties in one training session than the Ogres had suffered in their ten previous games. In posthumous honour of his technique, the Ogres renamed their training park Goadmalice Park because, in the words of team owner Rakan Gold, "That's where most of him is Comp

A huge thank you goes out to Khenian and Torpor for typing out a fair few of these, would have taken sooooo long otherwise :)